Ragtag Group of Weirdos

For two years now I've had the same group of kids in homeroom and also in language arts. They were last year's seventh grade, and they are now, obviously, this year's eighth grade. That class has 11 boys and two girls, and we have been through so many ups and downs in the past year and a half that they'd be impossible to enumerate here.

They can be a real handful. They're not always the best behaved, they don't always turn their work in, they they don't always make the right choices, and, frankly, they are exhausting. But, to me, they are wonderful. They are HILARIOUS (seriously, I could write a book), they are rambunctious, they are caring, they are original. Truly, this group of kids could best be described as a ragtag group of weirdos (in the best way), and I absolutely love them dearly. Let's be honest, if there's any group of people I should be with, it's probably a ragtag group of weirdos. They're my people, and I'd do anything for them.

Last week was Catholic Schools Week, and if you talked to me at all last week (and some of you unfortunately had to), you know that my sole mission in life was to get these kids to win the spirit stick at Friday's pep rally. They had a hard job -- they had to cheer the loudest and be the most peppy while also playing volleyball against the faculty and staff.

I usually teach these kids right before and right after lunch, so from about 11:23 to 12:11 and then again from 12:44 to 1:29. The pep rally was to begin at 2 p.m. I made them do actual language arts work before lunch (God forbid they learn something), but then after lunch I let them get ready for the pep rally.

It was one of the greatest things to ever happen to me in my teaching career.

The kids asked me to turn on some music. One of my girls set up an assembly line painting faces, one boy took small groups of kids outside to spray paint hair. They were making signs, getting their game faces on. They all had matching shirts. I went around tying up shirt sleeves with string, making piles of props, and taking photos to commemorate the fun. Around 1:20 I told them we only had about 10 minutes left.

"Miss Lafferre, we really don't want to go to seventh period. Can we stay?"

"Let me ask Miss Saseen (the principal)."

Miss Saseen said they could stay, if I was willing to keep them, and I was more than willing. I was having a ball. They worked together. They came up with a game plan to walk down the hall and enter the gym. At 1:55, after a few rounds of Sandstorm (Incidentally, who knew that's what that song was called? I thought it was just called like Euro Techno Club Jam), Thunderstruck, and Eye of the Tiger, it was time. I kept watch in the hallway, making sure the other kids in the school were well on their ways into the gym, and then I opened my door.

"It's time guys!"

They walked down the hall in silence, following their game plan, and carrying the tee-shirt of one of my sweet kids who had had his ankle broken in a basketball game earlier in the week and wasn't at school. They were silent, except for this one thing they call their "Celtic chant" which goes a little something like "Ahh-ooh, ahh-ooh, ahh-ooh." It's great.

They ran into the gym screaming, then went into the locker room. They wanted to make an entrance, and I wanted them to have what they wanted.

"Miss Saseen, they want to run out of the locker room when everyone else is seated."

"I'll have the cheerleaders make a tunnel like we do for basketball."

"Perfect."

I went to the locker room door and opened it. I could hear them getting pumped up inside, so I just stood there for a minute, listening to them and smiling. I went over to them and told them I'd open the door when we were all ready and that the cheerleaders would make a tunnel.

When everyone was seated, I opened the door. They went tearing through the gym, yelling and shouting, making tons of noise. All the other kids in the gym were cheering for them.

IT. WAS. AWESOME.

But not even the most awesome thing that was to happen.

First we took our spot on the bleachers and participated in some of the cheerleaders' crowd cheers that were part of the spirit contest. They did great! Then it was time for volleyball.

They took one side of the court, and other faculty and staff members and I took the other side. Playing against my own kids man, the worst. I played the first game with the staff and then my principal waived me over.

"They need a pep talk."

So I ditched my team for the eighth grade. I picked up a sign, took my place on their sidelines, and told them to pump it up. The ones who weren't on the court at the time would run over to the bleachers and pump up the crowd, yelling and high fiving. They were playing volleyball so hard. Hearing them during time outs in a huddle was amazing. They were pumping each other up and working together, all of them. What was awesome was that the kids in the stands -- the kindergarteners through the seventh graders -- were cheering for them USING THEIR CHANT. I was like "GUYS. Do you hear them chanting your chant?!"

Very sadly, they lost to the staff by the narrowest of margins (I'm still not convinced the score was totally accurate), but even then they kept up the pep. One of my quietest kids, upon them losing the game, said to the rest of them, "We have to keep it up guys."

And then, it was time.

"The winner of the spirit contest is ...

... the eighth grade!!!"

I. DIED. There were tears in my eyes.

They were dying too. They got the actual spirit stick and were waving it around.

Everyone got dismissed and they went back down the hall, so excited. I picked up all the stuff they left behind in the gym (one of the only two times I've EVER cleaned up after them ... time number two was after school when I cleaned up the bomb fallout that was my classroom) and went back to the room to join them.

I was like Guys. GUYS. I am so proud of you.

They wanted to do a victory lap. So, of course, "VICTORY LAP AROUND THE SCHOOL!" I took it with them.

We went back to class for afternoon prayer, and then I took a couple photos of them with the spirit stick. Then it was time to go home.

The thing is, we needed this so bad. These kids needed to feel like they were looked at in a good light by the people of our school. (Some of them. Some of them love them as much as I do!) Like I said, they have been notoriously hard to handle for YEARS, and that can be exhausting. But they have changed so much, and they needed that change noticed. Every single one of those kids contributed to the win. No one sat on the bench, no one was too cool. They all gave it their all. It was validation. Winning this spirit stick meant so much. It was validation.

In fact, one of my kids, one whom you would probably think really wouldn't have cared, said to me: "I have waited nine years to touch that thing."

If I hadn't already been pretty much crying, I would have cried.

And, as only this particular story with this particular group of kids could end, when I went back to class after parking lot duty I couldn't see the spirit stick anywhere. I was like REALLY. We have lost this thing after 10 minutes.

But then I quickly realized, what I am saying. These kids are the ultimate pranksters. (Turning things upside down, putting my class raven in the bathroom, etc.) So, after looking for about 15 minutes, I finally spotted it, wedged in between a metal cabinet and the wall.

I put it in its rightly deserved place of honor, in the front of the room.

Since Friday I have reflected on the fact that this spirit stick mission was truly my whole life. Like my current happiness depended upon whether or not 13 eighth graders. won a pep rally. spirit contest. And you know what? I'm okay with that. If that is my life, then I'm okay with it. Some people might think that is small when other people are out there saving lives and winning court cases and traveling the world and caring for their own kids, and maybe it is. But it was worth something to me. And the thing is, it had nothing to do with me. It had everything to do with them.

I just feel super lucky to know them and to teach them. It was one of the best days of my life.

2016 Reading Challenge - February!

So it's February, which means it's time to choose a new book for the 2016 Reading Challenge! 

I posted at the beginning of January about the challenge I decided to embark on this year, and my theme for the month was "A book you should have read in school." You might remember I chose William Golding's Lord of the Flies for that category. And guys ...

... it was terrible. I mean, I know I teach English and everything, but no. In fact I texted my sister Erin about it on Saturday, and it went a little something like this:

Me: You know what is so boring? Lord of the Flies.

Erin: OH MY GOD I KNOW. It's all about stupid boys.

Me: Why am I reading this? I selected it for myself for January, and now I have one day to finish it. God.

Erin: I really think that was a bad choice for you.

Me: Yeah. The theme was "book I should have read in school" and it was on my shelf.

Erin: It sounds more like "book about rampant misogyny." 

I mean, I guess the point of this challenge it to branch out and read books I might not otherwise read, but Lord of the Flies was so, so, so boring. (No disrespect to any of you out there who love it! But come on. :) ) And what's killing me is I have this kid in class right now who's not the world's best reader who chose it to read for Accelerated Reader. And I want to try to find a covert way to see how that's going and to see if he likes it while hiding my lack of a poker face. I'll try and report back. 

Incidentally, on a related matter, would anyone like a copy of Lord of the Flies? :) 

And now it is February. A short month. (Although longer than most Februarys are!) After looking through the categories and my bookshelf, I decided on a category and a title.

The category I'm choosing for this month is: A book you own but have never read.

And the title I've selected is: My Grandfather's Son by Clarence Thomas

In a way, I guess this is cheating because I don't own this book, it's my dad's, but it's been on my shelf for quite some time, and he hasn't asked for it back, so ... 

I'm excited to make this happen! Even though my challenge is off to a rough start, I'm still really glad I'm doing it! 

It's Who I Am

Do you ever have one of those days where you feel like you are crawling out of your own skin? I don't know how to better describe it than that. But whatever it is, that was me today.

I knew today was going to be tough because we were out Friday and Monday for snow, and nothing says "Don't worry, today will be great!" like a school full of kids who really just want to be home eating cookies and watching Netflix for the fifth day in a row. (... or maybe that was me who wants cookies. :) ) I had a pep talk with myself last night when I found myself getting increasingly nervous about today. I told myself that it was going to be crazy for many reasons, including changing lesson plans around, rescheduling tests, working with bummed out kids who can't remember to bring a pencil to class, etc. I put on a fun outfit, and tried to arm myself with a good attitude on the way out the door.

And it wasn't like anything BAD happened today, it was just awkward all day long. It's so hard to find your groove when you've been out of routine, and I JUST had to go through this a couple weeks ago when we returned from Christmas break. I just felt bummed out and anxious all day long. I was happy to be at school because I love teaching, but I just felt like I was crawling out of my skin all day long and my anxiety was through the roof. It just felt so terrible all day long.

In times like these, it's easy (at least for me) to get caught up in my own head and live there. It's super easy for me to go from "man, today is rough" to "my life is ridiculous/what am I doing/I need to get my life together/I can't do anything right/I'm a huge failure/I'm the world's worst teacher" (really living in those latter two today). It's a really slippery slope for me.

As I was driving home, still crawling out of my skin, but unable to pinpoint exactly why, I kept playing those terrible thoughts over and over on a loop in my head. I was really spiraling downward when I happened to hear this song on the radio that I'd heard before and liked but never really contemplated.

And the chorus goes like this:

You're a good, good Father
It's who You are, it's who You are, it's who You are
And I am loved by You
It's who I am, it's who I am, it's who I am

I am loved by You. It's who I am.

That's pretty simple. I can understand that. (And I can't understand a lot. Ask my sister Erin who has received about 84750982375930 texts in the past three days about this psychology class I have to take.)

Did it make everything better? No. Did it take my day from zero to hero (do people still say this?)? No. Did it change my life? No.

But it helped take a little of that mercurial anxiety away and it soothed me for a while. And I'll take it.

In the event you are crawling out of your skin today too, here you go:

For the First Time, One Time

Spoiler alert: I give away the endings of some books. But seriously, you should have already read these books anyways. :) 

For a lot of people, students and teachers alike, heading back to school after Christmas break is a real challenge. I'll admit, having time to myself has been nice, but I was really looking forward to heading back to school.

I really missed my students, and I was also really excited for a big reason -- January brings novel studies to each of my Language Arts classes. In the fall I concentrate mostly on short stories, plays, and poems, but the second semester is devoted to novels.

As I've said a lot of times, even recently, reading is so my thing. It always has been. And I know it's not everyone's thing, but I really believe that ALL children -- all people -- love stories. They love hearing stories, and, what I've found my students also really like, is having stories read to them. The students in my classes are all at various levels of interest about the books we're reading, but I've promised if they'll just trust me and stay with me, they'll love it ... or at least like it or find some value in it. Also, I told them that I don't purposefully go out of my way to choose boring books. I mean, for real guys, I have to read these books, too, and why would I want to go through 45 minutes of torture three times a day? It makes no sense.

The truth is, there are just few things in this world that are better than cracking open that book cover for the first time, opening to the first page, and reading those well-loved words for the very first time. I get SO excited that it likely borders on weird. But my students already know I'm weird, so they don't really flinch. :) I told each class a few times today, "I am so excited! I am SO EXCITED!" I just LOVE LOVE LOVE Beginning-a-Novel Day. (And, truth be told, other than that, today was just terrible, so teaching those novels was much-needed magic.)

Right as we all are opening the covers, hearing that distinct crack, and turning those first few pages to get to where the story begins, I say, "Who wants to read?" But before I call on someone, I add, "... with the knowledge that you will be reading the first words of our new book. And that is sacred." (I know, I'm a weirdo. Again, they know it too.)

8:56, second period, seventh grade, brought me: "When I stepped out into the bright sunlight from the darkness of the movie house, I had only two things on my mind: Paul Newman and a ride home."

10:40, fourth period, sixth grade, brought me: "The first week of August hangs at the very top of summer, the top of the live-long year, like the highest seat of a Ferris wheel when it pauses in its turning."

12:44, sixth period, eighth grade, brought me: "When he was nearly thirteen, my brother Jem got his arm badly broken at the elbow."

Guys. I get PAID at my JOB to read STORIES with KIDS. I mean, my job is really exhausting and frustrating and sob-inducing, but at the end of the day I read books with kids. Sometimes I seriously cannot even believe my luck. 

The thing is, I know how these stories end, they don't. And it both makes me smile and breaks my heart at the same time. I know that Winnie chooses not to drink the water and be with Jesse and he visits her grave later. I know that Johnny dies from his injuries after telling Ponyboy to "stay gold." And I know that Boo Radley saves Jem and Scout ... and after Scout takes him home she never sees him again. (Are you crying yet?) 

I know that, if these kids open up just a bit and let them, these characters will burrow into their hearts and stay there forever. My kids know that I've read these books over and over and have loved them forever. 

One of them said yesterday, "Miss Lafferre, I think you pick these books to relive your childhood." 

And it made me smile because, heck, maybe I do. I have nothing but the happiest, fondest memories of reading these books, but they are well-loved classics for a reason. 

As I told my eighth grade students last year, "You can only read To Kill a Mockingbird for the first time one time." And I want these kids' first times getting to know the Tucks, the Greasers, and the Finches to be some of the best of their lives. 

Staying in the Game

I usually go to a yoga class on Monday nights at 5:15 that I really enjoy. Tonight, as class was starting, the teacher, Ashley, read a quote from a writer she likes that basically said we have lots and lots of chances to try again and get our lives right. It sounded a lot like something I told my fifth grade religion students today. They had made some Advent goals (mostly surrounding treating their siblings better) and I told them that even though it's no longer Advent they can still be working on their goals. And that they'll fail sometimes because we're people and we get things wrong, but that's not a reason to throw in the towel. We have to get up and just try to do a little bit better today than we did yesterday.

What I really liked, though, was at the end of the class when Ashley said that we need to show gratitude to ourselves for "staying in the game." I don't know why, but that really struck me. I've never really thought before about being grateful to myself for getting up every day, even though I've made a lot of mistakes, and keeping going and moving forward. Truly, thinking back on all my bad choices and mistakes, I probably should have benched myself long ago, but I haven't. I've stayed in the game. And that's worth being proud of myself for.

As my life coach Kid President says:

Crock Pot Potato Soup!

I am hoping to be able to start putting more thought into what I'm making for dinner for myself, and, as it is winter and (finally) getting colder, I thought making a good soup might be nice. I asked my friend Melissa if she had any crock pot soup recipes that she liked, and she shared this potato soup recipe with me! She said that her family really likes it, so I decided to get the ingredients and try to make it myself today.

The good news is, a lot of times potato soup can be really unhealthy, but this particular version is really not! I added more pepper than it called for, and I also used a Greek cream cheese, and, although I have nothing to compare it to having never made this before, it was really good! And it's SO easy. Pretty much you just dump everything in the crock pot and turn it on. If I can do it, anyone can.

If you're looking for an easy and delicious soup recipe, I highly recommend this one. Let me know if you try it!

2016 Reading Challenge

I have been an avid reader my entire life, mostly thanks to my mom who read to me from a verrrry early age and who used to take us to the library all the time, especially during the summer. Not only did I read all the time, but I saw my mom read all the time too, and I think it's so important that children see adults read. To me, book characters have always been like friends, and, as I said once, I know so many because they were my mom's friends first. And if they weren't, I only made them as my own friends because my mom taught me how to introduce myself to them.

Because of the many (many) years I've been in graduate school and working, it's been hard to find time to read just for fun. Luckily I was able to squeeze in a few good titles this past summer, and recently I finished reading Fahrenheit 451 (for the first time, I'm embarrassed to admit). As a Language Arts teacher, it's so important to me that I show students that I don't just make them read, I'm always reading myself too. To that end, I adapted something for my school that I saw at another school, so teachers and staff at my school have signs outside their classroom doors that say "NAME is reading BOOK by AUTHOR," so that our students see that their teachers are reading books too. That sign holds me accountable to read to be quite honest, and I'm glad that we're doing it.

While perusing Facebook the other day, I saw that one of the teaching pages I follow posted about the 2016 reading challenge. I was very intrigued, so I investigated further. I found out that it is a challenge created by a blogger whose work I've read before, Modern Mrs. Darcy. Basically, there are 12 themes for the year, one for each month of 2016. The point is to inspire people to read new and different kinds of books, outside of their comfort zones. I think this idea is so awesome, so I am going to participate!

Here is the link to the post where Modern Mrs. Darcy introduces the challenge. Here is the official challenge list:

On her site, you can also download a free reading journal she created, but this year I think I am going to write about what I read in my daily journal I'm already working hard to write just a little bit in every day. (Even if it's just a sentence or two.) If all goes well this year, perhaps I'll try her reading journal in 2017!

I have a great book called Listography (if you don't have one, you should!), which is where I am going to keep track of the list (duh) of what I read.

After perusing all the categories and looking at my own bookshelf, one category and one book stood out. So, for the month of January, I'll be reading in the category "A book you should have read in school." (Sigh.) And that book is ...

William Golding's Lord of the Flies!

Want to join me for the 2016 Reading Challenge? I hope so! Let me know! :)